Navicon Torture Technologies

[antimatter]

Navicon Torture Technologies - это американский шумовой проект возникший в 1997 году человеком по имени Lee M. Bartow или известный как Leech. Его музыка имеет элементы многих Industrial-Noise суб-жанров, для которых действительно нет никаких универсальных согласованных определений, таких, как Power Electronics, Death Industrial, Harsh Noise, Power Noise.

(c) last.fm

Оф.сайт / Discogs / Myspace

Знаковая фигура на современной индустриально-шумовой сцене. Маст лисинг! Группа на своем примере показала, что павер электроникс может быть действительно разнообразным и звучать свежо и интересно.

Кидаю на заценку пару треков:
http://www.divshare.com/download/11507536-7f0http://www.divshare.com/download/11507596-b9a

Выборочные релизы:

2001 - Scenes From The Next Millennium

скрытый контент

Нажмите на кнопку "Спасибо", чтобы увидеть ссылку (нужна регистрация)
Возможно, потребуется перезагрузка страницы.

[свернуть]

[XALL]

классный проект ...кому интересно могу тоже много альбомов закинуть !

[junkyard buddha]

майка правильная у пацана

вечером оценю обязательно

[hyperballoid]

Спасибо проект достойный давно есть, уже теперь почти дискография вся имеется

[Ментальный_Воен]

про такую музыку обычно говорят "атмосфера неминуемого пиз...ца".
так и есть. самое оно, чтобы слушая сии мракобесные, стрёмные до жути звуки, бродить в одиночестве по недостроям и постоянно оборачиваться назад, боясь поскользнутся на залитой дождевой водой бетонной плите и сорваться в очередную зияющую плесневелым мраком дыру. звучит пафосно, да, но этот весь пафос выбьет струей зеленой с красным сопли при встрече головы с железо-бетонным продуктом жизнедеятельности урбанизированного города.
один только трек THE PIT чего стоит

antimatter,

[antimatter]

Benz, уже лучше

[Ментальный_Воен]

antimatter, дык, после пропиздона вдохновение нашло внезапно

[antimatter]

Benz, да прям пропиздона) вот заходит человек в тему, видит такие сообщения и ему уже интересно шо оно там такое. а когда видит одно "круто, ебошит, перезалейте, спасибо поцаны" как-то и качать не хочется, и самому эмоции выражать.

[Black Desolation]

antimatter,
спасибо! сейчас скачаю и оценим . позже напишу о прослушанном!
з.ы. ссылка битая, кто-нить выложите?!
з.ы.2 пардон за некропостинг, был занят.

[antimatter]

Black Desolation, я заливал на неформатовский сервак, все в порядке. посмотри под спойлером в шапке.

Добавлено через 39 секунд
а, и если еще че-то надо - обращайся. у меня почти полная его дискография.

[Cyclophosphamide]

Футболочка, что на товарище, очень понравилась бы раге ;-)

[antimatter]

Кстати, у NTT почти вся лирика о любви во всей её многогранности и глубоких душевных переживаниях.

[Black Desolation]

Сообщение от antimatter

Black Desolation, я заливал на неформатовский сервак, все в порядке. посмотри под спойлером в шапке.

Добавлено через 39 секунд
а, и если еще че-то надо - обращайся. у меня почти полная его дискография.

Та чета не работает, нажимаю под спойлером на ссылку в download master все переходит, тока он пишет об ошибке через пару сек + в опере такая же фигня.

[Cyclophosphamide]

Сообщение от Black Desolation

Та чета не работает, нажимаю под спойлером на ссылку в download master все переходит, тока он пишет об ошибке через пару сек + в опере такая же фигня.

Эта тема уже неоднократно обсуждалась, прописывай реферер.

[Sad Sanches]

Похоже я залип Такое отчаянье и ненависть

[antimatter]

Sad Sanches, альбом с шапки слушаешь?)

[Sad Sanches]

antimatter, не. The Gospels Of The Gash и I Fucking Hate You All And I Hope You All Fucking Die
С шапки тоже послушаю. Как Grunt докачаю правда

[antimatter]

Sad Sanches, оо, на The Gospels Of The Gash крутейшая вещь Mind Is A Prison. Кричащее отчаяние. I Fucking Hate You All And I Hope You All Fucking Die тоже классный, но в некоторых местах чересчур зашумленный.
Если надо - есть полно текстов NTT.

[Sad Sanches]

М, от текстов не отказался б
Кстати, I Fucking Hate You All And I Hope You All Fucking Die не показался таким уж и зашумленным, а вот The Gospels Of The Gash местами показался очень по death ind \ dark ambient

[mr. Finn]

Чертовски пугающий проект. Злой. Но не как ОЙ. А злой абсолютно и мегаразрушительно.

Сообщение от antimatter

Если надо - есть полно текстов NTT

Если есть, то почему бы не показать людям?

[antimatter]

THE GOSPELS OF THE GASH (2XCD, MALIGNANT RECORDS, 2009)

BOOK I – THE BRIDGE OF ORDEALS

THE NOOSE AND THE CLAWHAMMER

So, these are the animals we must contend with;
Our righteous claws shall rip them to pieces.
Our tools: A noose and a clawhammer, a heavy mallet and a box of reinforced trash bags, a dark blessing from the pit of despair.
Set us free, open wide the floodgates to our reservoir of madness and instill upon us the will to eviscerate.
Empower us with the desire to erase the goodness from our hearts and to create suffering with our hands, sculpting death with the very fabric of life, to take our collective revenge upon the arch-depravity of the wicked souls of our enemies.
They walk upon the earth as ambulatory gateways to the abyss.
Our hatred for them shall only bolster our love for them.


MIND IS A PRISON.

bludgeon me to remove this, the way it is, the way it needs to be
your space grows cold
as the scent on my sheets dissipates
the time it takes to breathe in and out
forgotten and left behind to become dull memories finally burned out
fingertips
outstretched across thousands of miles
winter
winter becomes spring
memory becomes video


VORTEX

locked in a room designed to absorb the lies you tell yourself,
your virginal, virtuous skin is a sham.
the audience laughs last as your facade slips away,
each syllable you speak is an obvious tool of deception.
venomous intent is now your only retreat,
devouring men is now your only recourse.
that black hole where you bury your secrets,
the inescapable void i can't stop myself from wanting with every ounce of my being.
give me a reason not to die. i need a reason, it could be a lie.


THEY WILL ALL DIE BENEATH MY HANDS

sick with despair
the walls close in and i suffer this relapse
vomiting pure DISGUST
infecting the very fabric of reality with my dreams of devastation
clawing away at the skin on my skull
driving my fingers into my eyes
i peel my face back and sink my teeth into your tits, tearing your ribcage open
i suck the air from your lungs
i suck the life from your heart
i ingest your soul and spit it out upon the pool of blood growing beneath you
you're not good enough to swallow, none of you are worth enough to sustain me.
no amount of water will wash away your stain.


EVIL NEVER RECEDES

I can only find true love behind the barrel of a gun.
Reaffirming the ugly vacancy of my empty life:
When I see a girl smiling, I want to erase her face.
I push the knife into her lower back, just above her ass.
She is now my possession, a puppet for my amusement.
A puppet made of meat.
I take my time with her.


MY WHOLE LIFE IS A SUICIDE NOTE.

elements combine to create life without purpose, acid light against the skin of a newborn.
this infant cries out and greets a world of shattered hope, it's worse than we ever thought, says the father, while the mother is a husk sucked dry by parasitic resentment.
this child is the walking dead.
this child suffers and seeks revenge.
this child suffers and seeks solace in the wombs of a thousand victims
while the sun burns holes into the skin of a thousand more children
and diseases of the mind will never die
tossed upon the rocks of eradication
impassioned sentiments become caustic rants of lunacy
the moon turns to blood
the river beckons from 42 metres high
this child dives, and dies a man

23 EYELESS WOMEN

the first one tempers, the last one cracks
and she says to me, 'the funny thing about love, it makes you question whether you still want to throw a guy to the dogs after he comes inside you'
and then she throws me to the dogs
tossed around like a fucking rag doll, my hands are chewed to pieces and they rip out my throat
all i ever wanted was to touch your feet while we watched tv


SHRED OF REMORSE

So now, you seek to punish me for loving you.
This is the only crime for which I can claim any guilt.
The only wrong I have committed against you was asking you to give something of yourself, to be willing to be vulnerable, to not be selfish and to have empathy and regard for how another person feels.
Because I love you, I selflessly ignored my own emotional well-being in order to give you what you told me you needed from me.
And for that, I do most ardently apologise.


THE FIRST BROKEN HEART

cast out of an eden, which never was
grasping in the dark for an empty hand
calling out to the void, never to be answered
the lies echo across a burning world
and murders in your name go unpunished
so who was it broke your heart
were we born to crush ourselves
it was not i who broke your heart
because you don't exist.


BOOK II – THE SPACE BETWEEN DEATH AND RESURRECTION

THE COLLISION OF SENSUALITY AND DEATH

A dead heart and a brain as cold as clay
She enters my soul and begins to have her way
Never a smile, never a flinch,
She cuts me open, slicing inch by inch
Grey, gleaming skin – she smells of hell
I am forever entranced – a slave to her spell
When she grows tired of this evisceration game,
She tells me she’s leaving and I should forget her name.


SELF-CONTEMPT AS AN OCCUPATION

THE SEPARATION OF US. WARNING SIGNS
DOOMED FROM THE START, EVOLUTIONARY CHAINS BROKEN, POSSIBILITIES ERASED.
BITTERNESS RISES TO THE FORE.
AGAIN IN SOLITUDE DESTROYING MY NEUROLOGICAL PATHWAYS
WALKING AWAY BACKWARDS I TRIPPED ON THE CONCRETE AND SANG TO MYSELF WORDS OF SELF-CONTEMPT
TEARS ARE A MEMORY IT'S ONLY A PANG OF WHAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN WHILE IT CRUMBLES BETWEEN MY TOES
'YOU'LL BE GOOD, CUZ YOU'RE ALWAYS GOOD'
WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN, HE ASKS CONFUSED AND WALKS AWAY FROM HIMSELF
DREAMING OF HER TIGHT SKIN BETWEEN HIS FINGERTIPS WHISPERING HIS INTENTIONS, 'TO MAKE YOU MY POSSESSION' HE FOOLISHLY ADMITS THIS KNOWING IT'S IMPOSSIBLE, THE WILD CREATURE CAN NEVER BE TAMED AND THE TRAGEDY IS TO TAME IT OR EVEN ATTEMPT WOULD BE A CRIME AGAINST NATURE
TAKE YOUR REVENGE ON ME, EVERLASTING NIGHT SKIES DROWNING IN GASHED LIPS THE COLOUR OF DEATH THE FLAVOUR OF DREAMS THIS IS THE STUFF OF HOPELESS ROMANCE POWER DRIPS AWAY IN PRECIOUS INCREMENTS LIKE SEMEN TRAILING DOWN FROM BETWEEN THE LEGS OF SOMEONE YOU RUINED


HOPELESSNESS IS THE GREATEST APHRODESIAC

i can almost taste the metallic tragedy
a gun to my head as the window cracks
black sunlight erases the past
blood runs between us as our bowels rot together
i see through to your spinal column
breaking your bones by hand takes the beast from my smile
black sunlight erases the future
and all i remember is my fingers inside you


PANTYHOSE AND LIGHTER FLUID AT THE FOOT OF A SHALLOW GRAVE

i'm just like any other fucking slave.
descending again, in an accelerating decline to the depths of psychological decay.
i hope there is a hell because it's got to be better than this.
at every turn, upon each dawn, i am reminded that i am worth less than nothing.
every time there is a spark of hope, i feel compelled to stomp it out because i know it will inevitably come to the same conclusion as every previous spark in the path of fiery carnage behind me.

...insane with grief, pain overwhelming my spirit, my head in my hands, i imagine a scene...

she is tied down with piano wire upon a filthy, blood-soaked mattress, in a mockery of the crucifixion.
steel pipes, sharpened to a point at one end, have been driven through her hands.
he stands above her, dressed in the blood expelled by her ruined genitals.
her breasts are swollen from repeated impacts from a thick leather strap.
bite marks crisscross the abused skin of her inner thighs.
her thong has been shoved into her mouth, resting against her soft palette and threatening to sink further down her throat every time she swallows.
her mouth is sealed shut with a thick wad of heavy-duty black electrical tape.
her stinging eyes focus long enough to see what he holds in his hand.
he buries a large-bore syringe deep into her chest, and in one motion, he pushes the plunger down, injecting hydrochloric acid directly into her heart.


IN SUFFERING THERE IS BEAUTY

cultivate my wounds
red and raw and wet
sliced, infibulated, dusted down with ash
this is what your love feels like
this is what your love looks like


HUMAN RODENT

he transforms into a human rodent
hoarding semen-stiffened kleenex
chewing away at the walls of his cage
insanity is the plague he carries
his soul stinks of shit like a filthy sewer
his shining eyes are black and dead
his heart is lost


PEST HOLE

i enter the pest hole
beset on all sides by all forms of vermin
alone in the dark, never felt so good
the choking stench threatens my consciousness
cracks in the walls collect toxic bacteria
smothered by this claustrophobic blackness,
my fear takes hold
i begin hacking away at my surroundings,
digging my way back to the surface with bleeding fingers,
as i kick and shriek and climb and claw
the tunnel collapses and the sacred light hits my eyes.
at long last, i emerge,
clad in the contents of your stomach.


BENEDICTION

A tragedy…
The ones you left behind
You’ve touched us all
Your memory lives on
I’m sorry you had to go
You won’t live to see the world end.
The ones you left behind, their skin burned by the sun
You’ll never see the end,
The end we all deserve.


VTERVS (CD, NCC RECORDS, 2007)]

I LOVE THE POISON IN MY VEINS.

i want to eat you like a fine pastry, he says
she sleeps at the foot of the bed
toes curling in dreams of her next orgasm
all he can think of is the inside of her all pink and dedicated to his undoing
if that obsession becomes reality
thanks very much for this disease
mental illness is my way of life...


A L O N E

we all are born and die alone nothing in between changes that fact nothing in between changes the core of who i am nothing in between her thighs can change what i want nothing in between her thighs can change what i am nothing in between HER eyes.

give me what i want
there is nothing


HE WANTS IT TO END

he rises from his grave, as grating sounds of bone against steel create the sparks of dawn in the distance,
the yawning pit of life expands to devour mountains and oceans until all that remains is a darkness where
contempt cries out in monosyllabic death sentences.
holy as all things violent are, crushed under the weight of ten thousand gravity wells, he rides the solar winds into oblivion and caresses the burning skies as they drown in flame.
pure darkness, the utter absence of light, heralds his arrival.
his fists upon the essence of existence, pounding, pounding;
mis-shapen and roughly-hewn forms of life spring forth like blood from a gaping cunt and crawl upon his crumbling body,
spilling upward and into the sockets of his sightless eyes.
he becomes everything and nothing,
and nothing can save him now.
light enters from another dimension and there is a cold hush in the void as it parts to allow the soft skin of her hand to slide over his fevered brow.
the chaos recedes only slightly, fighting to regain its hold, only to be brushed aside by her tenderness.
the blood which had clotted into a cylinder of rotted words in his throat is shattered
and he speaks for the first time those words which have no meaning to her.
the barriers remain unbroken and she pulls herself back down into the depths of her solitude.
pieces of him rain down over her like screaming animals,
their voices are atomic explosions and their hearts are obliterated as they impact against
the anti-terror field generated by her invulnerable heart.


I AM INSANE, AND YOU ARE MY INSANITY.

i force myself into the smallest possible space, pacing inside the black cube of my mind,
words and thoughts too extreme to be turned into actions fly from the walls to weaken my defense mechanisms.
i can't erase these thoughts of your mouth.
watching you walk toward me, watching you walk away
the chain grinds against my skin as the images flicker in my skull - dreams turn to ash in my hands and i know i'm afraid to feel.
i'm afraid of you because these words exist.
the ones i write about are the most dangerous, but to feel the heat of your breath would make the apocalypse seem worthwhile.


TEMPTING THE DARKNESS

return to the empty womb, split wide open by the brain's capacity to fool itself.
believing that there is a chance in hell, i ride the eye's waveform to the soft skin of your lower back, protruding.
my hands are rough and scarred but they become as soft as silk as your flesh turns them into instruments of death
and your mouth calls to me to fall in, spilling downward into the chasm of your throat and exploding against the rocky canyon walls
as i tumble without end in silence grasping at you hair for a handhold that never comes.
my will manifests too late and trapped in time, we tumble together, a game of sorts with parrying blades,
invisible to the naked eye this goes on and on with no resolution.
we dare not speak the words because the atmosphere will disintegrate if my true intentions are intoned.
your intentions are unknown to me and i assume you have nothing but a clear understanding of what i can only think is my methodology,
leading me to a closer understanding of what you are, who you are, why you have this hold on my spirit.
demons laugh from within my chest and my balls tighten as the ringing in my ears bears your name.
i yearn to cradle you in the dark,
our lips will never touch and this is a tragedy i am prepared to live with because i have always lived with it.


WHAT WOULD I BE WITHOUT THIS FEELING?

what would i be without this feeling?
guts rotted out within me
blood frozen in mid-heartbeat
your skin burning my eyes into embers
an inch away from the end of time
a promise never kept
a word never spoken
a life never lived
somewhere the dreams i have of you come true but i will never see it happen.
i don’t exist without my reflection in your eyes
i don’t exist.


sick

crawling under my skin, ruin me with the contagion as my chapped epidermis is sloughed off in flakes of black,
leprous, parasitic emotions which threaten my future self
force myself to believe in this idea, this falsehood, this imaginary truth:
'i have love to give'
i have nothing, it binds my decaying cellular structure in grotesque quasi-human form
i will never know peace
i am a fool
crush my bones and smear my guts over miles of sun-baked concrete
teach me the final lesson
so that i may stop the chaos
a bullet passes through my skull
the exit wound opens to a brighter day
the curse is lifted and i am free from my addiction to the unattainable
blood stains washed away
crime scene cleared
evidence tagged and filed
self-termination is a dream perpetually incomplete and never to be realised
the dream of holding hands under a blue sky
perpetually awakening to the fact that i am a piece of shit.


REASONS FOR RATPOISON

another monday, surviving to breathe this decaying atmosphere yet again.
he rises from his coffinbed in his nest.
empty, aching, filled with a silent sorrow that comes from solitude.
this was his choice, this is his punishment.
the quality of this cold air, grey and dead, silent like the slience of that aforementioned sorrow.
his loneliness fills his lungs with fluid and he drowns inside himself, as usual.
there was that time when he held your hand in the rain, looking back on it now it seems like some pathetic dream,
like the one he had recently where you were keeping each other's feet warm by rubbing them together.
and then he woke up. he wishes he could wake up now, his insides have been hollowed out.
instead of organs, he's filled with disease and loathing for himself and everything around him.
he's filled with regret for his stupidity and recriminations for everyone he's ever hurt in his life,
in this quest for something that doesn't exist.
he even feels guilty for loving you. but it doesn't matter, because it's not real for you anyway.
he's just another shadow on your heels.
she reminds him now that this is all his fault, and he accepts that.
it's fuel for his self-hatred, it's what he needs to survive, feeding on the discarded emotional skins of other people,
this is apparently his purpose in life, to travel without moving across an emotional landscape filled with dangers,
to crawl through miles of muck to arrive at the other end reborn and covered in rot,
chewing on the constantly regenerating broken heart in his guts.
the words become a childlike singsong lullaby, he drifts off to sleep alone and cold with them crushing him into the bed:
'but i deserve this. i deserve this. i deserve this.'
because i'm twisted. i'm selfish, i'm self-absorbed, i'm narcissistic, and i'm completely devoid of redeeming qualities.
and you were right to keep your distance, to shrug him off like just another mosquito hunting for the heat of your blood.
he needed more proof that there is no reason for anyone to give a fuck.


YOUR EYES

being in love. like being a walking corpse.
an empty shell spurting rotten fluids from every orifice.
doomed and damned, organs putrefying and flesh flaking off in sheets.
nothing and nothingness. i recede into the darkness.
my skull collapses and a flock of flies escapes from their nest.


SENSORY DIVISION AND SELF SABOTAGE

warm and wet, the night closed around me, around us.
concentrate on what's ahead, i demanded of myself.
skin calling to me like a mewling cub needing sustenance, i could not look away.
those curves and crumbling thought processes, drunk on denial and smoking cancersticks for the thrill of it.
holding in the gaseous waste of my trembling corpse,
the heat of the season creating wet grass to lay upon and ponder the brightest star in the sky,
the moon travels on her course and illuminates what i think i want, what i know i need, what i think i need what i know i want, confusion.
the barrier that will never be crossed. crashing down around my shoulders,
time and space become crystalised and we stop and step back from the train wreck in progress,
the avalanche in pause, before we collide,
before genitals meet and lips froth with the exchange of different flavours of saliva,
diametrically opposed down to the very last molecule, one male, one female, both totally fucking insane.
realisation, a mistake to be averted. step sideways to avoid the crunch of bone on bone.
looking back to see the damaged hulls of two ships that passed in the summer night, never to meet again.


I WANT TO BREAK YOUR HEART INTO A THOUSAND PIECES.

falling face-first from the expressionless sky above your freckled skin, looking down into my doom.
your body is the open window, ten stories high, through which i throw myself.
gleaming bone-white, the ghost of your face
rises up to greet me
rushes up to meet me
rushes in to eat me
my insides are pulverised
by the smooth curves of your lips
your hips
your tits
like concrete, cement, steel-reinforced and unyielding.
i dream about the touch of your skin against mine
smashing the life right out of my lungs
as they collapse from the impact
that never happened
i wish for it
i wait for it


I AM MY OWN WORST ENEMY.

I am my own worst enemy.


[PURE-SKIN (CD, NCC, 2006)]

THE STARS AND THE SCARS

you are staring into the eyes of someone whose every curve and corner is burned into your memory. you remember the smell of their skin, the heat of their body. the taste of their sweat, the scent of their genitals and their anus lives within you. every detail and inch of them, every tiny frail hair on their arms and the surface of their body, the contours of their face, every scar and pore and eyelash is a part of you.
they walk past you on the street and you barely recognise them.

NO HANDS, NO TEETH

They found her in a ditch somewhere
With no hands and no teeth
Her killer
Or killers
Removed them so she could never be identified
No DNA on file
No identifying marks
I pulled her teeth out and smashed them with a hammer
I sawed off her hands,
boiled the flesh from the bones and smashed them into powder
her murder will go unsolved
her death will go unrevenged
for 100 years.
Found her in a ditch
No hands, no teeth
They’ll never find me
Her murder won’t be solved
For 100 years
After my death
Found her in a ditch
No hands, no teeth
100 years


HEART

in my willingness
to be vulnerable
i found strength
i opened myself to you
i gave you my heart
i asked for very little in return
i cut myself open
and carried your name in my chest
the blood still boils in my skull
my eyes still sting with memories of your scent
are you really so blind and ruined
are you really so corrupt
that you will choose this life
of grotesquery and emptiness
to spite yourself?
this is not who you are
if you could only see yourself
the way i see you in my nightmares
you'd know how fucking out of my mind i'd have to be
to believe you're worthy of my time.


PARIAH

walk the streets cutting throats and slipping in pools of the blood of my enemies


OYABUN

shoving the blade through your flesh.
This is what I live for.
This is my reason.
This is my purpose.
This is my reason.
This is my dream.
this is your nightmare.
This is my purpose.
Shoving the blade into your body.
It passes through you.
I am the blade. I enter your flesh.
I am becoming you.
I occupy the space where you once stood.
I am the blade.
I am the blade.
Into your flesh.
I am the blade.
Into your flesh.
Shoving the blade into your flesh.
I enter your flesh.
14 inches of carbon steel.
14 inches of cold steel.
I pass through you.


THREE KNIVES

Dissection of a human heart
Forcible extraction of the uterus
Three knives
To end human lives
Three knives
To steal the light from your eyes
Three knives
You see them
Three knives
You see them
Scraping the walls of her uterus
Put myself into this wicked space
Awakening from the thrall
Dissemble
Dissemble
This is the universe where I am encased
In a mile-deep pit of feces
This ruined jaw cracked from tension
Three knives
You see them
Three knives
Three knives
I use these three knives
To steal the light from your eyes.


SELF EVISCERATING CONCEPTS

as i sit here observing the death of my future i am reminded of what it is that separates me from the rest of you.i am not breathing the same atmosphere, i am not feeling the same emotions, i am not constructed from the same matter as the people who surround me. i am above, so much beyond, and yet so much less than you. i am an animal yet undiscovered amongst the evolutionary chain, wholly unrealised by reality and existing between the rafters of what your feeble brain chemistries can comprehend. skin beckons to me and i hear its siren call under the surface of my grotesque flesh. undesired and underdeveloped, i cry myself to sleep and cut the truth into my chest with a thousand razorblades. when i find love i know it will gut me on the shores and leave me to wallow in my own entrails until the sea erodes me into a piece of the landscape. diseased mind, repulsive bionet and decaying psyche bundled into a rotted carcass to be catalogued and entered into the journals and mythology of a dead culture.


A CONSTELLATION OF SKIN

this void in his guts terrifies with its similarity to love.
flesh versus emptiness and a cold body drowning,
a urine-stained heart muscle; the autopsy report
states quite clearly that his corpse was humiliated
by yearning to hold her in sleep.
tracing the contours of her ribcage and hips
a fistfull of her hair as tongues collide.
sweaty and slick into unconsciousness, undulating,
the pallour of her skin and the colour of her eyes
carry an addictive chemical that has the capacity to crush bone
and disintegrate muscle tissue.


IT’S BETTER THIS WAY

i keep telling myself
it's better this way
your voice shakes me to my foundation
i can't go on the way it has been
it's too much for me
i have to pull my hands away from the flames
i don't want to let go, but
it's better this way
it's better this way
it's better this way


SKY-BLUE MUSTANG

daydreaming of a long-lost sexual obsession
the pleasure of her pink pussy against my skin
memories of moonlight reflecting off the hair on her arms
her face pushed down in the pillows in a stoned delerium
how i tied her up naked in my basement,
made her pose for me
i could have ruined her life that night
and i still regret that i didn't
now all i can see is a headless deer
bloated and rotting in the back of an ashphalt truck
the smell reminds me of better days
driving over a cliff
in a sky-blue mustang
long legs wrapped around me


THIS IS HOW WE PRAY. WE PREY.

This is how we pray.
We prey.
I want to tear your sweet flesh asunder,
Keep you imprisoned upon the bleeding hooks of my unquenchable lusts.
I want to ruin you
And disfigure the smooth contours
Of your perfect body.
I want your love.
This is how we pray.
We prey.
Corruption
This is how we pray.
We prey.
I take advantage,
I can’t help myself.
Look into my eyes.
Divine conscience
Deprived of conscience
Your skin is so soft.
This is how we pray.
We prey.
This is how we pray.
We prey.


[THE ARROW AND THE WOUND (CD, EIBON, 2004)]

EVERYTHING CORRODES.

I BREATHE IN HER PHEROMONES
THE ESTROGEN,
LIKE TINY SPLINTERS OF GLASS
FLOWS THROUGH MY VEINS AND CAPILLARIES
TEARING ME UP INSIDE
I BLEED FROM EVERY HOLE,
UNTIL THERE'S NOTHING LEFT.


CALIPSIA666

IT MAKES HER FEEL GOOD TO SEE HIM CRAWL.
THE SCARS NEVER HEAL, THEY JUST GET DEEPER
AND HE GETS STRONGER
UNTIL THE HOLES SHE LEFT CLOSE...
THE INFECTION DRIES OUT,
SHE BECOMES A DECAYING MEMORY
OF A BAD DREAM.


UNABLE TO MAINTAIN A CREDIBLE PUBLIC PERSONA

my mental illness continues to manifest in festering
patterns of disgust, my brain secretes too much
testosterone, some chemical feedback disrupts my sleep patterns
and my body spasms with cascading seizure-like activity
which feels like a melding of orgasmic waves and tourette's syndrome.
my sex drive wildly beyond control, my anxiety
level almost more than i can contain, i fear for myself
and those around me. i am an emotional terrorist,
a psychotic parasite seeking the debasement of those
foolish enough to trust me. i want so much to bury
myself between asscheeks and fill cunts with my contempt,
driving my cock deep into rectums while smashing
jawbones with my knuckles. dragging them by long blonde
hair across rooms to be hogtied and sodomised, i spit
into their waiting mouths and humiliate them with a
backhanded slap across their tear-streaked faces.
i shove both thumbs into their assholes and drool
into the gaping pink pits of despair, sucking the saliva
out and spitting it back in repeatedly until it becomes
a thick soup which i then let run out from between
my teeth onto their pale cheeks.
these words fail to accurately explain the depths of my total fucking ruination.


LOVE IS UNBRUISED KNUCKLES. (lyrics by C. Goudreau of SICKNESS)

YOU KNOW WHAT LOVE IS?
LOVE IS NO DUCT TAPE.
LOVE IS NOT LEAVING YOU IN A SWAMP
WHEN I'M DONE WITH YOU.
LOVE IS NO INDUSTRIAL-STRENGTH GARBAGE BAGS.
LOVE IS UNBRUISED KNUCKLES.


THIS IS NO TIME FOR THE INNOCENT.

blue sweater girl with shiny blonde hair
i want to fuck your asshole.
i want to choke you with my cock,
and break your fucking jawbone.
i want to conceal your corpse
beneath the cold waters of an un-named lake
and live out my life in freedom
with the knowledge that i saw the beautiful
lustre in your eyes
fade away, and laugh to myself knowing
i was inside you
in your final hour.


CORPVS LVTEVM

i pull back on your soft, straight black hair,
it hangs down your back like a curtain.
my cock presses against the walls of your rectum.
i pull back so hard, i push deep into you.
your toes begin to curl,
your calves cramp from standing en pointe for these many hours that i have been fucking you.
you let out a pathetic series of staccato whimpers, tears begin to well up in your eyes from sheer exhaustion.
i whisper into your ear, 'i'll never let you go.'
we stand together, almost motionless
as the atmosphere dissolves,
and mankind goes extinct.


I WISH YOU WEREN'T WHAT YOU ARE.

strike me down into the depths of perdition
feed my flesh to depravity and sin
the eaters of sin claw away at my deformed carcass
i feel the tide of your body heat recede
i can't hear you anymore
you won't look at me.
what crime have i committed?
i'm giving a piece of myself to you for safekeeping,
you take it into the ground with you and bury my dreams.
once, you let me hold you in my arms and i dreamt of hope,
i prayed that my dreams might bear fruit.
that piece you hold rots in the dirt with my hopes.
hope is a sickly diseased fragment of discarded gristle,
it leaves a greasy stain upon sun-cracked ashphalt,
just as my touch left a greasy stain upon your marble skin.
you allowed me to sculpt a version of your true self.
you warned me, but i didnn't listen.
you said you would hurt me, but i have grown used to that.
you said i would hate you, but i won't let that happen.
i would rather hate myself.


LOVE'S EXECUTIONER

WHISPERING ECHOES AND MEMORIES OF BETRAYAL
MISPLACED JEALOUSY WHITTLES AWAY SLICES OF MY LARGEST BONES
UNTIL I LIMP LIKE AN ANIMAL WHICH HAS BEEN CRUSHED BY FAST-MOVING TRAFFIC;
EMBEDDED INTO THE RIBCAGE ARE CHUNKS OF BLOODIED ASHPHALT AND STONES HAVE BEEN FORCED INTO MY EYES AT IMPOSSIBLE SPEEDS.
YOU STROLL BY ME, BARELY BOTHERING TO LOOK IN MY DIRECTION AS THE OXYGEN BETWEEN US IMPLODES AND THE SUCTION COLLAPSES MY BRAIN CAVITY AND PULLS EVERY DROP OF MUCOUS FROM MY SKULL, TURNING MY EYESOCKETS INTO RIVERS OF BLOOD.
YOUR WEAK, MEANINGLESS WHORE'S SMILE SLICES THE ARTERIES IN MY THROAT
AND I VOMIT MY ENTIRE BLOOD SUPPLY ONTO THE FLOOR IN FRONT OF ME, AND YOU GINGERLY STEP
OVER THE WIDENING PUDDLE WHICH CREEPS OUT
IN A RADIATING CIRCLE BENEATH MY FEET.


M E A T

i can't wait to shove my cock in your throat
and force you to puke all over yourself.
you like to tell me how tight your cunt is, but
when i'm finished with you i'll be able to fit both
hands and my cock inside you with no effort.
i want to punch you in the back of your skull while drilling myself into your asshole, you scream that i am
your christ while i choke you with your own hair,
pounding against your soft white ass, splitting your rectum
wide open. i pin your knees down next to your head
and spit in your eyes, biting your lips and pulling on your hair so your neck is craned back, snapping it
hard with every thrust into your deepening cunt.
my elbow is pushed into your throat and your eyes roll back,
tears streaming down your temples into your hair.
you cough once, twice, then relaxing as you simultaneously orgasm and lose consciousness.
there is something very wrong in my brain.


HOW TO KNOW LOVE FROM DECEIT

i need to destroy things
for them to be real.
i need to self-destruct
in order to feel.
every murder i conceive, every crime against humanity;
the mountains of decaying corpses that blot out the sun
above the burning fields of my imagination -
these are all for you. i dedicate the endless
depths of my depravity to the memory of our love.
this is for you.
i do this all for you.
i pull the bones of my chest open for you.
i do this all for you.
the murders are all for you.


[DRIPPING WITH THE POWER OF HER FLESH (CD, IMMANENCE, 2004)]

IT GETS DARKEST BEFORE THE DAWN.

I WAS BORN TO BE SURPASSED, SOMETHING TO FORGET ABOUT;
A MEMORY JOYFULLY EXPUNGED IN FAVOUR OF MORE PLEASANT THOUGHTS.
I AM A PHASE IN THE LIVES OF THOSE PASSING INTO GREATNESS, NEVER TO BE LOOKED BACK UPON IN A POSITIVE LIGHT.
I SEE VISIONS OF MY OWN DEATH.
THE VEINS IN MY SKULL VIBRATE WITH FEARSOME QUAKES AS MY GRASP ON REALITY CONTINUES TO DETERIORATE.
THE SKY OPENS AND HEAVEN SHOWERS ME IN FOECAL MATTER.


A REBOURS

MY INSIDES ARE ROTTING AWAY
AS I GROW FAT FROM THE SALT OF SUCKLING INSECTS.
I TAKE A FISTFULL OF YOUR HAIR
AND HAMMER AWAY AT YOUR FRAGILE SKULL,
CRACKING YOUR JAWBONE INTO PIECES.
THEN I SMASH YOUR FINGERS SO YOU CANNOT
TORMENT ME WITH WORDS.
THE INSECT SWARM SHALL RISE UP
AND DEVOUR MY FLESH
AS I PENETRATE YOU FOR THE LAST TIME.


HUMANSLAVES

NOT FOR ONE SECOND HAVE I FELT RELIEF FROM THIS OPPRESSIVE HATRED FOR MY FELLOW MAN.
I WADE THROUGH THE HUMAN EFFLUENCE TO FIND A REASON FOR MY EXISTENCE AND COME TO THE SURFACE WITH HANDS COATED IN STEAMING OFFAL.
I DROWN SLOWLY AS MY LUNGS BOIL OVER WITH THE ROTTEN SKIN I AM FORCED TO INHALE.
I WILL NOT BE POSSESSED.


the pain breathes in me still, tainting my dreamspace.

HANG ME ON A HOOK, MURDER MOST GLORIOUS!
FEAR IS HER BIRTHRIGHT
TINY PRICKLES OF BLACK
STARVED FROM ATTENTION
STARVING FOR AFFECTION
FROZEN MEATHOOK CARCASS THAT I AM


WE DISSOLVE IN IMMENSITY

I DESERVE EVERYTHING I WANT, WHAT I WANT IS EVERYTHING.
YOUR TEARS HAVE COME FAR TOO LATE, MY SPINE HAS BEEN LAID BARE FOR YOU AND I WILL BE AVENGED...
...LET THE MURDERS BEGIN SOON, AS I RAPE AND MUTILATE TENDER PALE SKIN, FRESH-FACED VIRGIN WHORES WITH SPATTERS OF BLOOD UPON THEIR ROSE-SHADED CHEEKS, SOFT LIPS PART FOR MY COCK AND MY KNIFE WITH THE SAME ENTHUSIASM AND I HAMMER AWAY AT THEIR BROKEN SPINES...
AS I AM BLASTED AWAY AND CRUSHED UNDERFOOT, THE HATRED SPILLS OUT FROM MY BOWELS.
I AM DISEASED AND WORTH LESS THAN NOTHING IN YOUR EYES, SO I WILL PULL THEM FROM YOUR FACE WITH NEEDLENOSE PLIERS IN A VAIN ATTEMPT TO REGAIN MY SANITY AND MY MANHOOD. YOU ARE SO VERY SOFT AND GROWING COLDER BENEATH MY TREMBLING FINGERS AS THEY RUB AGAINST YOUR TEETH AND DEAD TONGUE...
I'M LAUGHING AS I PULL THE TRIGGER ON THE WAY TO PARADISE. [I WALK THROUGH HER BEAUTIFUL BLACK CLOUD, AND ON THE OTHER SIDE, DISCOVER MYSELF]


SHE IS LIKE WINTER.

i want to suffocate
i want to spontaneously die,
my corpse ground down into meat
by an array of gargantuan millstones.


I WANT TO WORSHIP AT YOUR ALTAR.

I REALISE I DON'T DESERVE TO BE PITIED.
THIS CRUSHING AGONY IS THE PRODUCT OF MY OWN INSANITY. I WANT TO REACH OUT AND EVISCERATE THE OXYGEN WHICH SEPARATES OUR BODIES. YOUR PALE SKIN REFLECTS THE POWER IN MY EYES. I WANT TO TAKE YOUR THROAT IN MY HAND AND BECOME A PART OF YOUR ANATOMY. I WANT TO RUN MY FINGERTIPS THROUGH THE COARSE CHASMS OF YOUR SCARS. I WANT YOU TO CHOKE ON THE TENSION OF MY SPASMING COCK AS MY SEMEN PULSES AGAINST THE BACK OF YOUR THROAT. I AM EVIL. I AM NOT WORTHY OF YOUR SPITTLE UPON MY BROW. I WANT TO WORSHIP AT YOUR ALTAR. I WANT TO DROWN IN THE BURNING FLUIDS OF YOUR WOMB. I FLAGELLATE MYSELF; PRONE ON A SURFACE OF GROUND GLASS, EMASCULATED AND POWERLESS; YOU STAND ABOVE ME AND TAKE PITY UPON THE WORST ASPECTS OF MY BEING. YOUR PAIN SETS ME AFLAME AND MY NIGHTMARE ENDS.


[TRYING TO REPLICATE PROFOUND CIRCUMSTANCES (3INCH CD-R, MOUTH, 2003)]

TRYING TO REPLICATE PROFOUND CIRCUMSTANCES

feeling like myself, but diminished.
you live in me, you are my bloodstream,
you wear me like the pelt of some ancient mammal,
hunted into extinction by an early ancestor of man.
this tragic travesty of myself: little more than a gutted carcass
and i'm never alone. you're never alone.
i want to snuff myself out and pull all the fires of heaven into my heart.
...you abuse my flesh, you abuse my mind.
i can not exist without your approval.
you tempt me with freedom while digging the hooks deeper into my back.
i've got nothing else to live for.
my bodily functions are dictated by the whims of your torment.
my suffering is my own creation,
facilitated by your ebb and flow.
but i will leave my mark upon the world.
in your name, the cities will burn.
i thought i could stand tall, but my strength has crumbled beneath your eyes.
you are my destroyer. you are my saviour. you are my angel of obliteration.
the soft white skin of salvation never existed.
this realisation dooms me to an endless cycle of sleepless nights and lost hopes.
loneliness is now my lover, evil be now my good.
i am an ignorant slave, hewn from dung and mud.
i have nothing.
whatever happens to me now will be the direct result of the tragedy you and i concocted together.
...force your thumbs into my eyes and gorge yourself on my blood.
scream into my face that you hope i implode upon myself.
tell me that i am worth less than nothing.
tell me the truth, say you never loved me.
drive rusted nails into my wrists and ankles.
chain me to the stone surface of your heart and feed me to predator rats.
tell me the truth, tell me i'm nothing.
...weeping children fall under the weight of my bootheels.
my conscience is my punishment.
my grief is my power.
you are the dagger in my chest,
and i use that dagger to cut myself open every hour of every day,
just to remember how it felt to have you in my arms.
the wound heals over and i start digging at it again.
the wound begins to close and i pour acid into it.
...the life flows from my veins.
you undress, dumping my remains into a rancid heap of decaying meat.
you are done with me for now.
but i can wait forever for the next time you want me to suffer beneath your blade.
i'm perfectly willing to supply you with a target for your loathing. my scars have toughened me to your barbs.
and i will always adore you.


[THE CHURCH OF DEAD GIRLS (2XCD, MALIGNANT, 2002)]

THE GATES OF HELL OPEN TO REVEAL SHINY WHITE SKIN.

my corpse soars bleeding into the abyss of lost love. i shriek in fear, covering my eyes with my forearms, forcing the winds of change away from my face. in the deep distant bowels of the earth, i see the flames dance upon the fleshy, womblike walls of this endless tunnel downward which expands around my broken soul, taking me in like a flaccid cock, tightening around me, pulsing and lubricating from the heat of my body.
i am forced further downward by an intricate system of muscular contractions, faster and harder as i go deeper.
finally, i arrive at my destination: a huge, cavernous pit of endless fires, consuming the helpless wailing forms which writhe in agony, calling out to an empty sky for mercy. i fall into the ocean of burning bodies and i cry out in joy as i am engulfed by eternal flames, my fleshly sins burning away like the flesh of all of these suffering masses.
i melt into the wailing dead, and join them in their songs of divine retribution.


ORDINARY BODY HORROR

sweet pink skin of a child
destroyed under my eyes
pure hatred burns from my face
nothing survives my holocaust
murder you all
animals of skin and ignorance
i'm losing this tenuous grip
the weight upon me grows
kill myself
anything within me which may have resembled humanity
has been erased.


BENEATH THE VEIL OF SANITY BEATS THE THROBBING PROCESS OF DECAY.

travesties of unarmed neurological pathways
my draconian countenance, an inescapable glare
desires for annihilation of the external and indulgence in the basest internal natures
i have never seen heaven.
there was never a time when i was taught to accept an intrinsic positivity in the nature of humanity,
my observations have only convinced me of the exact opposite;
love is a dead language;
my eyes are a predator's eyes;
i see nothing but an ever-shifting amorphous blob of bloated human insects, like an excited swarm upon a smashed and gutted corpse – this world upon which we thrive – i am miserable as i come to understand the minimal (yet important) role i play in the continual decay of this planet.
in an attempt to grapple with the madness i feel rising within me, i take on the persona of a superbeing, an immortal god-emperor whose very name sends entire galaxies into panic.
in my internal universe, I Am Him.
I AM HIM!
this self-indulgence only barely saves me from the daily humiliations of my life...
a point comes when it becomes too powerful to contain within me. the violent, genocidal-rape-fantasies coalesce into a new organism which explodes from within my distorted body. i am momentarily empowered, but i realise only too late that the presence within my body had been all which sustained me. i use this New Knowledge to construct an infernal device to pump my blood until my greatest desires are fulfilled.
the beast which was birthed by me assaults an incalcuable number of humans, laying waste to this world, while at the same time fostering the inception of a new ecology which waits for the dark days to draw to an end.
i become the god-emperor i had always wanted to be, my one-beast-army maintaining my absolute power with the very real threat of its own existence. the population turns to me as their divine saviour, the man who is responsible for their utter extinction.
my health fails yet the machines keep me alive, vast oceans of blood are fed into my brain every hour. the most holy of words become synonyms for my name.
absolution and vindication are the lights which glow dimly in an otherwise empty sky. the only horizon which i am able to perceive is a landscape of nightmarish disappointments plaguing me until i lay coughing up blood as cancer grinds me into nothingness.
this is the brightest future i can imagine:
living a mundane unexceptional life upon a dead earth where the oxygen supply is poisoned and depleted due to excruciating and irreversable over-industrialisation. food supplies are synthesised and waste products are recycled. too little, too late.
man's folly; man's end; man's destiny.
'god bless us for fulfilling christian dogma.'
i say a silent prayer thanking my victims for providing me with the energy to sustain my life beyond the bounds of biology. i have always dreamed of bearing witness to the last gasp of man's empire. it has long been my most joy-filled dream to observe the first sunrise over an earth devoid of human life.
my wish has come true.
my corpse crumbles into the wind and birds begin to sing again after centuries of silence...


BEAUTY IN THESE RUINS

trembling here, alone in a nameless space, i dream of you.
i fixate on scattered evaporated memories of tenderness and sweet voices hushed in warm adoration.
the ruined dreams resurface in repeating patterns, waves of impregnable hurt crash into me, depriving me of hope for myself.
the ruined dreams in which the blade between us continues to slice me open.
slices me open.
slices me open.
slices me open.
please show me the beauty in these ruins.
i need to see the beauty in my own destruction.


FIVE POINT LIGATURE

i will slice the throats of my enemies
i will stab out their hearts and turn their chests inside-out with the blades between my fingertips.
i will mutilate bodies and crush the bones of innocence.
i will stride across seas of infected blood and reduce mountains to steaming craters filled to overflowing with charred human remains.
my voice will shatter the sun.
in my final moments i will remember the ecstasy of your gaze.


DEATHCRY

images of unkindness
kindle the flame
feed the voracious animal
inside my mind i attack without mercy
your tears and your slit throat
my claws dig for your heart
i ravage your tender flesh
mutilate you
make you mine
what have i done to deserve the way you make me feel about myself?
i am YOUR viktim...
...not the other way round...
YOU bleed ME. YOU BLEED ME.
i opened my heart to you
and the result
is more
pain


A NEED TO BE DESIRED II

try as i might to fetter these feelings to the stone,
i can not imprison a perfected concept, i cannot drive the nail to the bone, i cannot hold down one thought and expand upon the driving concepts behind it.
an angel awaits beyond the dead sphere which surrounds my spirit. her radiance burns away some demons in my past and it brings me joy to see her slay them. the stain upon my soul won't be so easily eradicated. this creature of darkness that i am has always been insatiable and it overwhelms my thought processes at times, darkening my eyes with that familiar serial-killer-stare as dreams of nightmarish sexual dominance ripple beneath the surface of my skin.
inside me something new awakens and remembers what i once was and taunts me with what i can be again if i forget to live without hopelessness.
there are inherent dangers within this new environment; perceptual differences could destroy me. opposing belief systems could destroy me. giving too much of myself could destroy me.
the greatest fear is that my angel will be devoured by the foul depraved monstrosity which lurks behind my eyes.
her tears would eviscerate the universe.


I FEEL READY TO COMMIT WANTON, HEINOUS ACTS OF RAPE AND MURDER UPON HAPPY LOVERS AND THE POPULATION AT LARGE...

i awaken with a hunger which can only be satisfied by bloodletting on a massive scale.
the perfect skin and pale eyes of thousands of soft feminine viktims will part to reveal wet treasures and oceans of pain.
i live to hear the air escaping from the slit throats of gutted corpses and the sobs of dying women
as their sanity is twisted into fractured nightmare. there is no one on this planet who could ever truly love me.
i am a grotesque villain. i am beyond redemption. i am an insect.
i deserve to suffer.
i await the last echo within my chest, the corpses piled high in the craters of my imagination.
my hands are tainted with the decaying memories from lives cut short by my inability to cope with my environment.


SOUL MURDER, REVISITED

alone in a dying field of light
i fall forever into myself
drawn closer to the darkness, ever-collapsing
my mind and body seperately disintegrating
there is no conscious thought
i have nothing left to offer
the world around me is gone
i no longer care for anyone
i take ME and pull ME apart
i can prove that i am worthless
nothing can touch me but savage winds
i am bathed in oceans of sorrowful tears
my flesh falls from my broken bones
i am exposed for the universe to ridicule
every lie i have created to protect myself
every humiliating moment in my life
all are chronicled and announced by my every cell...


THE ILLUSIONS THAT LONELINESS MANUFACTURES

you were an
ANGEL. DEMON. VIKTIM. SURVIVOR. LOVER. HATER. SAVIOUR.
FRIEND. ENEMY. FUTURE. DESTROYER. LIAR.


THE SIMPLICITY OF HOPE

divinity and corruption
administered in equal measure
isolated from your perfection
i am a hateful heretic
my skeletal remains
shall not bathe beneath your light
you will never speak my name again.


[I FUCKING HATE YOU ALL AND I HOPE YOU ALL FUCKING DIE. (CD, BLADE/EIBON, 2002)]

I WANT TO HANG MYSELF.

I FEEL NOTHING
I AM EMPTY
I HAVE BEEN BETRAYED
THERE IS NO LOVE IN ME
EVERYTHING HAS BEEN TAKEN
I AM TOTALLY ALONE
WHY WAS I BORN TO SUFFER
I WANT TO CEASE TO EXIST
I WANT TO BE NOTHING
I WANT TO KILL MYSELF
I WANT TO HANG MYSELF
I WANT HER TO SEE ME DIE
AND KNOW THAT SHE HAS KILLED ME


MURDER ME SLOWLY, PLEASE.

UNDER THE CRUSHING WEIGHT OF A CRUMBLING SPIRIT
AS MY REALITY UNFOLDS AND FALLS IN UPON ITSELF
I SUFFER ENDLESSLY, AND I TRY TO STAY STRONG IN THE FACE OF IMPENDING DARKNESS
TO NO AVAIL
THIS PAIN IS MY SUSTENANCE
I AM INCAPABLE OF COMFORT
I AM IMMUNE TO JOY
I WAS BORN TO SUFFER
TO FEEL THE SLICING BLADES OF SCORN
I AM AN ILLUSION
I AM ALONE
I AM INSIGNIFICANT
I AM EMPTY OF ALL WHICH MAKES MY LIFE WORTHWHILE.


DRAINED OF ALL LIGHT

I AM THE SOURCE
OF BLACK DREAMS
OF SICKLY THOUGHTS
I CREATE EMPTINESS
THE VACUUM POURS FROM WITHIN ME
IT ENGULFS EVERYTHING
THE DARKNESS WITHIN ME
IS A STARVING BEAST
WITH RAVENOUS APPETITES
INSATIABLE MADNESS
IT SLICES SOFT BODIES
IT CONSUMES
THE FABRIC
OF REALITY
AND SHITS
UPON THE THOUGHT OF LOVE.


THE BURNING SLOWLY

I WANT TO START KILLING HUMANS.
BRUTALISING THE FILTHY MASSES,
I CRUSH SOULS WITH EVERY WORD.
STRIDING ACROSS THE BLEEDING EARTH
EVERY CITY TURNS TO ASHES.


[POWER ROMANCE (CD, CRANIAL FRACTURE, 2002)]

MY ANGEL WITH HOOKS IN HER EYES

DESTINED TO BRING UPON MYSELF ENDLESS
WISDOM THROUGH AN ACCUMULATION OF ANGUISH
HERE IS AN ENTRANCE
HERE IS AN EXIT
DESTINED TO TELL LIES TO MYSELF
I CREATE AN ILLUSORY SPHERE FOR THE WAY YOU SMELL
THE WAY YOU FEEL NEXT TO ME
THERE IS A DEAD HORIZON
OBJECTIVES NOT SOUGHT OUT BECOME REGRETS
FEAR OF REPERCUSSIONS
TERMINATION OF WISDOM
THROUGH AN ACCUMULATION OF HALLUCINATORY EXPERIENCES
I FALL FROM GRACE
AND THERE YOU ARE TO TAKE ME BY THE HAND
AND GIVE ME REASSURING WORDS
BUT I KNOW YOU ARE NOT REAL
NOTHING MORE THAN THE CONSTRUCT OF MY DESIRE FOR YOU
BORN OF A PSYCHO-EMOTIONAL ARTIFICIALITY
HOW DARE I EVEN THINK ABOUT
INTRUDING UPON THE PURITY
OF THAT LANDSCAPE?


WHEN YOU WALK PAST ME

MY VOICE LEAVES ME MY MIND COLLAPSES
MY EYES BECOME FIRE MY SOUL BURNS
MY FLESH COMES ALIVE MY BODY FREEZES
I HAVE BEEN TOLD I AM WRONG
AND I HAVE MY OWN DOUBTS
FEAR IS A FLOWER IN MY HAND
THIS IMPOSSIBLE CONFIGURATION
I KNOW I AM ABSURD
HOW PATHETIC IT MUST SEEM TO YOU
MY DESIRES ARE IMPURE
MY MOTIVES ARE DUBIOUS
BUT THIS IS AN ABSURD WORLD
AND REASON IS NEVER REALITY
CALL IT BY THE WORDS YOU KNOW
LUST SEEMS INACCURATE
AND LOVE IS A DEAD LANGUAGE
LAW IS NEVER ON MY SIDE
AND TIME MY WORST ENEMY
YET I YEARN TO SHOW YOU
THESE WORDS
MY THOUGHTS
I CONVINCE MYSELF
OF REASONS WHY I SHOULD OR SHOULD NOT
...AND EITHER WAY, IN THE END, I WILL BE WRONG...


SPIRITVS CAPAX

EXPLORE THE DEPTHS OF MY SELF
TEST THESE WATERS
TASTE THE WIND
TRAVERSE THIS GAPING WOUND


Today is the Day.

AN OVERSIMPLIFICATION OF MY EMOTIONAL STATE CAUSES ME TO CONSIDER WHETHER I SHOULD
ALLOW MYSELF TO BECOME CONTENT WITHIN THE CONFINES OF PRESENT REALITY OR EMBRACE
THE CONFUSION AND CHAOS WHICH WAIT JUST BEYOND THE THRESHOLD OF MY FUTURE...
I HAVE BEEN TOLD MANY THINGS.
AMONG THEM, THE WORDS 'MANIFEST YOUR DESTINY' HAVE BEEN THROWN MY WAY.
DO I DARE TAKE CONTROL IN A HARSH ENVIRONMENT?
WHAT WOULD BE THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS?
HOW WILL MY LIFE CHANGE, AND WOULD SUCH CHANGE BE FOR THE BETTER?
QUESTIONS. NOTHING BUT QUESTIONS, LIKE A PLAGUE OF FLIES, A FLOCK OF HARPIES
DIVING AT ME IN DEFIANCE OF ANY NEW STRENGTHS I MAY FIND WITHIN MYSELF.
THE PATH MUST BE CLEARED OF OBSTACLES.
I MUST STAND TALL AGAINST THE WINDS.
THE DAWN RISES AGAIN
I AM BATTERED BACK DOWN
TO THIS WEAKLING I AM
AND ALWAYS WILL BE
DAMNED BY MY OWN FEARS


A NEED TO BE DESIRED

TRY AS I MIGHT TO HOLD THE LEASH ON THESE EXPECTATIONS, I RETURN TO THIS SILENT PLACE.
NOTHING CAN SAVE ME, I AM IMPRISONED WITHIN MYSELF.
SHE BECOMES AN ICON OF UNREACHABLE STATES; A NIRVANA, A VALHALLA,
A PLACE WHERE I KNOW NOTHING BUT ENDLESS JOY.
THE TRUTH IS IGNORED, AND WHEN I AM REMINDED OF MUNDANE REALITIES BEYOND
THE SCOPE OF MY CLOUDED MIND, I FALL INTO A YAWNING DARKNESS.
THE POOL OF BLOOD WHERE MY DREAMS DROWN.
IT IS IN THIS PLACE WHERE I NOW REST, AT THE FLOOR OF AN OCEAN OF PAIN.
THE DISTANCE BETWEEN MY FINGERTIPS AND THE SOFT WHITE SKIN OF SALVATION INCREASES
INSTANTANEOUSLY AND EXPONENTIALLY.
I REMEMBER WHO I REALLY AM, AND MORE HURTFULLY, WHAT I AM NOT.
I BECOME GARBAGE ONCE AGAIN.
FEEDING ON SELF-LOATHING, DISGUST, AND A DESIRE TO CEASE TO EXIST.
I HAVE NOBODY TO BLAME BUT MYSELF.


SCUMBAG PASSION

POWER
ROMANCE
CONTROL
SELF
CONTROL
NO
SELF
CONTROL


[NATURE'S VIOLENT OVERTHROW (CD-R, TRONIKS, 2001)]

BIOLOGICAL IMPERATIVE

SELF PRESERVATION
IS HUMANITY'S MOST CULTIVATED INSTINCT.
SELF DESTRUCTION
IS MAN'S MOST CULTIVATED INSTINCT.


INTO DARKNESS, BLINDLY GOETH I

I CAN'T TAKE IT.
INTO DARKNESS, BLINDLY GOETH I


[INSANITY (CS, LSD ORG, 2000)]

TAKE YOUR CHANCES!

TRUST NO ONE.
SO MANY WAYS TO DIE OUT THERE.
FUCK YOU, TAKE YOUR CHANCES.
FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! TAKE YOUR CHANCES!


MORE BODIES, MORE VICTIMS

IF THE DISEASE VECTORS CANNOT BE IDENTIFIED,
THIS WILL BECOME AN IMPOSSIBLE SITUATION TO RECTIFY.
MORE BODIES, MORE VICTIMS.
THOUSANDS, PERHAPS MILLIONS WILL DIE WITHIN A MATTER OF WEEKS.
THE VIRUS WILL CONTINUE TO SPREAD, THROUGH UNKNOWN MEANS,
AND THERE WILL BE NO WAY TO STOP IT.
I FEAR THE END OF MAN HAS FINALLY ARRIVED.


TRENCH

THEY POUND ON THE PLACE
WHERE ONCE BEAT A HEART
THEY BURN THE BLACK SPACE
WHERE THEN AND NOW PART
THEY WILL RAPE MY POOR TORTURED HEAD
THEY WILL CONTROL ME UNTIL I AM DEAD.


THE SMASHED BODY OF A WRETCHED ANIMAL

I REMAIN LOCKED AWAY
FROM HUMAN CONTACT
AS MY FLESH WITHERS FROM MY BROKEN BONES.
I AM UNWORTHY OF LOVE OR COMPASSION.
I AM THE MOST HATED OF ALL BEINGS.
I AM ROUTINELY HUMILIATED AND INJURED TO ILLUSTRATE MY LACK OF WORTH.
HOLD ME DOWN AND PUNISH ME.
I DESERVE TO BE TREATED LIKE DIRT.
I AM DIRT.
HURT ME SO I KNOW I'M WORTHLESS.


ISOLETTE

EMPTY.
I'M ALONE.
ALWAYS ALONE.
EMPTY AND ALONE.


BEING.

MY SOUL IS DEAD.
MY BODY IS CORRUPT.
I HAVE NO REASON FOR BEING, OUTSIDE OF THE ENDLESS SUFFERING UPON WHICH I THRIVE.
KILL ME NOW.
PIERCE MY CHEST WITH A KNIFE.
PUT A BULLET IN MY BRAIN.
SAVE ME FROM MYSELF.
PULL ME OUT FROM THIS HATED FLESH.
DESTROY ME.
GRIND ME INTO DUST.
BURN ME ALIVE.


[SCENES FROM THE NEXT MILLENNIUM (CD, MALIGNANT, 2001)]

01.01.01.AD.

NOTHING HAS CHANGED.
THIS WORLD IS STILL SHIT.
PSYCHIC TRANSMISSION OVERLOAD
NEURAL SIMULATION DISEASE
DEVASTATION OF MILES OF HUMAN FLESH
BURN DOWN THIS USELESS EMPIRE
TWO THOUSAND YEARS OF IGNORANCE
ANOTHER THOUSAND YEARS OF PAIN
AND THERE IS NO CONFUSION
ABOUT THE INFINITE END
LAY WASTE TO THIS HUMAN STAIN
DOMINATION OF BROKEN BACKS
AND SHALLOW IDEOLOGIES
WILL MEAN NOTHING IN THE OPEN FLAME.


THE LAST DAY

MUTILATION OF THE SWEETEST SOIL
EARTH'S GREEN IS CONSUMED
AS THE LAST ATOMIC CLOUDS FADE INTO MEMORY,
THE STINKING HUMAN MASS WRITHES IN AMNIOTIC HATRED.
I STAND UPON THE BLASTED SOIL
A SMILE SLOWLY SPREADS ACROSS MY SMASHED FACE,
AS I REALISE,
I WAS BORN TO WITNESS THE END OF THE KINGDOM OF MAN.


POST-PARTEM

THE TRUTH IS MY PRISON:
ALL I SEEK IS ACCEPTANCE
ALL I RECEIVE IS GUILT
I'M DROWNING IN MY OWN BLOOD
I'M FESTERING IN MY OWN WORTHLESSNESS
I AM WORTH LESS THAN NOTHING
YOU MAKE ME FEEL LOWER THAN DIRT
YOUR SILENCE BURNS MY SPIRIT
MY EXISTENCE IS FUTILE
I AM HELPLESS AS A CHILD
WHY DID YOU NOT ABORT ME IN THE WOMB?


FREEDOM OF CHOICE IS THE RIGHT TO HATE.

I HAVE RAGE
I HAVE HATE
THROUGH THE FLESH AND BONES
I LEAVE MY WAKE
AS I BEAT YOUR BLOODY SKULL
INTO THE DIRT
MY LOVE FOR YOU
WILL DISSIPATE


LORD, HAVE MERCY!

MY CONTEMPT FOR THESE ANIMALS
GROWS STRONGER WITH EACH NEW DAY
LORD, GRANT ME THE GRACE
LORD, GRANT ME THE POWER
LORD, GIVE ME THE STRENGTH
TO ANNIHILATE THIS FLESH


I SHALL FEAR NO MORE.

I MUST CAST OFF THE FETTERS OF MY PAST
I MUST EMERGE FROM THE CHRYSALIS OF CHANGE
I MUST STAND TALL AGAINST THE WINDS
I MUST BREAK THROUGH THE WALLS WHICH CONFINE
DESTROYING ALL WHICH MAKES ME WEAK


SEPPUKU

YES...
IT IS ONE MORE SLICE ON HIS WRIST
ANOTHER SCAR TO LICK AWAY IN THE DARKNESS OF HIS CELL...


HERESIARCH

THIS IS NOT THE GOD OF LOVE
THIS IS THE GOD OF GENOCIDE
WATCHING DYING CHILDREN WRITHE
THROW THEM TO THE HUNGRY FLAMES
AN OUTSTRETCHED PALM TURNS TO KNIVES
A LOVING SMILE BECOMES HATRED
WE TURN OUR BACKS FROM THE TRUTH
AND THIS HUMAN HELL GRINDS ON


RAT ADDICT 2000

GUILT AND REGRET
HAVE BECOME
HIS DOUBLE HELIX
THEY PULSE THROUGH HIS VEINS
POSING AS RED CELLS
HE HAS DAMNED HIMSELF
AS HE HAS BEEN DAMNED

[свернуть]

[Sad Sanches]

winter becomes spring
memory becomes video

мрачненько так и отрешенно

[Доброжелатель]

MY EXISTENCE IS FUTILE
I AM HELPLESS AS A CHILD
WHY DID YOU NOT ABORT ME IN THE WOMB?

Фаааааак!

[mr. Finn]

Пересрался сегодня Шел слушал в плеере сабж, переходил дорогу чуть машина не сбила

[Sad Sanches]

Нужна тема про дарк эмбиентный проект Лича?

[antimatter]

Sad Sanches, конечно нужна!)

[Sad Sanches]

Какой же у него альбом Pure Skin охуенный , именно чувствуется что:

Сообщение от antimatter

вся лирика о любви во всей её многогранности и глубоких душевных переживаниях.

Очень сильное влияние оказывает. Трек The Stars and The Scars вообще великолепный.

[mr. Finn]

Сообщение от Sad Sanches

Трек The Stars and The Scars вообще великолепный.

имонно!

[Foma]

как я проебал эту тему, слушал только I Fucking Hate You All And I Hope You All Fucking Die, очень сильно

Сообщение от Sad Sanches

Какой же у него альбом Pure Skin охуенный

де можна скачать?

[Sad Sanches]

Сообщение от Foma

как я проебал эту тему, слушал только I Fucking Hate You All And I Hope You All Fucking Die, очень сильно

де можна скачать?

Я отсюда брал http://rutracker.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=2860609 - 47 релизов NNT